As a writer, I am still trying to find my lane. I know that I can write just about anything but I don’t want to. I’m looking to further my portfolio but by writing pieces that I’m passionate about, things that actually matter to me. I’ve always been interested in the interactions between men and women, whether as friends or more. Eventually I hope to further my education by studying the psychology of people.

I believe by March, I will focus solely on the interaction between both sexes and my writing will reflect that. I know there are millions of folks that focus on that as well, but I’m going to put my own spin on the topic. As of right now Im looking to explore different routes but as I begin to go on this journey I know my path will become clearer to me.

Shout Out to my Instagram Sis, for keeping me on my toes.

Tristan J.


I slid up in his DM and got politely rejected.

Listen I am all for women going out and approaching men. Why should the guys have all the fun. If a man catches my eye, of course I will approach him. Since I do not know him, there’s nothing to fear. Rejection? Sigh, thats a fact of life. I’m sure before this rejection there has been other times I was told No, but I don’t remember them and soon enough I will forget this time as well. We always hear life is too short, which is true, so why not, Just do it?!

Have you ever been on the train (NewYorkers) and seen someone attractive? How many times have you made eye contact and smiled but they did nothing to come your way? OR how many times have someone looked at you and you absolutely felt the vibes, but neither of you made a move? How many misconnections have you experienced? Well one is too many for me. I will continue to approach folks, and attempt to explore the connection.

Tristan J.


House Hunting

Even though I’ve been told I am not asking for a lot, clearly I am since I could never get the basic things I am asking for in a relationship/friendship. IF the date, takes me to your house, I am not with it. I am not in that type of space with anyone that I am that comfortable to continue or start our date at your house.

Whenever I had company, Garlick (My mother) always made us stay downstairs. As she explained we honestly had no reason to be upstairs in the bedroom. We wasn’t having sex, so why did we need to be in the bedroom? There’s a television, and all amenities such as food downstairs. I’m starting to feel the same way, you don’t have to push or pressure me into coming over, cuz I know I’m not trying to smash so whats the deal?

Sometimes I feel like canceling dating, and just participate in an arranged marriage.


Tristan Jonez.

Sfter (Softer)

As a woman I’m doing my best to work on being softer. I’ve become used to doing things for myself but I never want to make a man feel like I don’t need him. I do, I need him for many things and I want to make sure I don’t become so hard. Just because I’ve had to open my own doors, I need to give the man a chance to open my door. I’m not a fan of dumbing myself down, and I’m not asking you to do that either, What I am asking of you, is to give the man a try.

Although I haven’t met any in a while, I’ve been assured that gentlemen still exist so give them a chance to reveal themselves. Give a man an opportunity to woo and wow you. As much as we’ve had to depend on ourselves, don’t let what’s happened in the past create a problem for what could happen in the future. Prince Charming is definitely out there, just give him a moment to declare his status. Don’t we always say Actions speak Louder.

Be Patient



What’s a lil Head?

As taken from HBO’s Insecure, Would you date a man who had been with another man? Said man you’re dating only received head, there was no penetration.

In all honesty, I would continue to date my guy. I’m not thrilled about him being with another man however I’m open enough that I understand fully exploring your sexuality. If this event happened once in college, and he knew immediately after that men was not for him, then why would I fault him for being honest with me. I do believe that there are some things that should remain silent. If as a way of getting to know you, I asked ‘hey have you ever been with a man’ then I think you should answer honestly. But If I never ask you that, then don’t take it upon yourself to volunteer that information. Some folks can not handle the truth. You have to know your audience, before you drop those kind of gems.

If the man I’m dating, had penetrated/was penetrated I would probably have reservations about continuing to date that person. I wouldn’t judge, but in my mind I would always wonder if he still want to be with a man. I just want to be sure I can trust the person I am engaging with. We all have a past, and there will something in that past that the next person may not like, you just have to find the person who accepts yours.