I know there’s a saying that if you only worked on days where you felt like it, you wouldn’t be working much, and while that might be true, I think I owe it to myself to be genuine. Sometimes I don’t feel like writing, and I make myself write something, anything. When in reality I should listen to my inner being, and not write. I hate writing some bullshit filler just to say I wrote something. Nah, I’m done with that. I can say that everything that I’ve been posting lately has all been genuine, I’m proud of myself. Trust me, I know folks can read when you just doing to do. I want my craft to be respected, because when pen hits paper I want you to feel every fukking word!
Writing has saved my sanity. Writing saves me. It gives me clarity, especially during those times when I don’t know my left from my right. When I’m doubtful in who I am, I write. When I’m feeling neglected, I write. I fall into these mini depression spells, when I start to thinking too much about the future or the past, I have to remember that writing saves me. I don’t always upload everything I write, because at times, Its just jibberish, its just me putting pen to paper. But for my inner being, when that pen hits paper, its as if my mind is being massaged, all the kinks being smoothed out, and I can finally relax.
Even though most would say this is the season of the side chick, I think we have to keep into perspective, that we are all one choice from being a side chick, unfortunately.
I almost found myself in such a position, but then I chin checked myself. Although I am single, and able to do WHATEVER the hell I want, I chose to be aware of the complete situation. If I willingly ‘date’ a man in a committed relationship, then I deserve whatever Karma may have in store for me. He may not respect the relationship, but you definitely have to respect yourself enough to not play seconds to someone else. We can’t always blame the shortcomings or the demise of a relationship on the man who is in said relationship, especially if the other person is aware. Now, I’m not saying you should approach the ‘other woman’ cuz ultimately Its for the man to take full responsibility.
However my question still stands, If he doesn’t respect the relationship he is in, should you?
I’ve reached, No, I’ve surpassed my limit. While I will continue being the amazingly nice woman I am, I am no longer catering to anyone’s feelings. Especially when my feelings are never a pause for concern. I don’t remember folks, making sure I was alright, BEFORE, doing me dirty. I can’t remember someone handling me with kids gloves so I am not sparing feelings anymore. If I don’t set limits for myself and what I’ll allow then I’m just setting myself up for people to treat me however they feel I deserve.
Once folks have crossed the line, how do you remedy that?