“Thought you’d keep me from cheating with your abundance of Love, thought I’d keep you from cheating I kept you cumming so much.”
Isn’t this the classic case of miscommunication? She’s showing love, thinking it’ll keep him satisfied. He’s showing sexual pleasure, thinking it would keep her content. And in both scenarios, they both cheated. As much as we don’t want to have those necessary conversations we must. We have to. To end up from putting our all into something that we are not ready for emotionally or physically. There are times in my past I had the courage to ask for what I wanted, and the confidence to walk away when what I wanted wasn’t what was on the menu to be had. As much as we want people to want what we want, it doesn’t work that way. I do believe a man will tell you the truth the first time you ask, but after that, he’s going to tell you whatever he thinks you want to hear.
I cant love you into loving me. I can be the perfect girl, the ying to your yang and I still won’t be what your looking for. I can love you in ways, you’ve never felt, never imagined you could feel and you’ll still not be ready for me. I can literally show you why it didn’t work with anyone else, you can KNOW I am the person you would like to take that leap of faith with, but if you aren’t ready you will create excuses. So my question, how do we determine when we should fight for someone who has signs of trauma, who can’t seem to let go of the past hurts, and move forward? For me, I need to see some signs that you are attempting to seek out the help that’s necessary for you to move on from what you’ve been through, more than telling me, “I’ll think about it.”
To do List, how to communicate with the intention of comprehension.
Song Lyrics Break My Heart (My Fault) Ft. Lil Durk
What if? In all my disappointments in Love, what if I was doomed before I had even started? Doomed before I could really have the opportunity to explore what Love was, What it means to be Loved in a way, that positively changed my life? As I get older I think I am in agreement with Wale … “What if Love is nothing more than a fairytale?” Then I’ve wasted so much of my life, looking, and waiting for the perfect love story. My first love is starting to feel like a story that didn’t really happen. As most of y’all know, my first love committed suicide so I do feel robbed. Sometimes I wonder if I felt the things I really felt, if the love we shared was real, and if it was, why did he make the choice to leave me, knowing all I had been through.
Emotionally I’m not ready to finish this conversation.
I’ve come to have more of an appreciation of Jay-Z as I’ve gotten older.
Big up to my homie Deja, because of said friend, I am able to listen to the FULL collection of work by Jay, on Tidal. I wanted to hear his interview which was exclusively, on Tidal, but then I started to miss being able to hear his music whenever. Yesterday, I was going thru some of the music, and really thinking about his songs/albums and which one or ones relates to my life. Watch the Throne is my absolute Favorite body of work.
SideNote: I’ll be happy when Kanye and Jay, finally sit down and hash out whatever the issue is between them. Listening to Watch the Throne, has me all in my feelings as they make AMAZING music, it’s such a special body of work. As men, I know it sometimes take a bit longer to reach out when lines have been crossed, but as family, we all gotta swallow our pride and make the move.
SideNote II: Although I haven’t really had a chance to listen to 4:44, Watch the Throne will forever be Number one for me. Every time I listen to the album I feel as though I am fucking royalty, and I am coming into my own as a blk princess. I love the contrast between Jay-Z’s voice and Kanye’s. Even the flow of the album sits well with me, honestly one of both their best work.