communication

Luv U.

Living Life

As much as we may want the very best for our friends. As much as we may want nothing but greatness for them, we cannot be willing to work harder for it than them. Trust, I know that shit sucks but you’ll kill yourself trying to obtain greatness on behalf of someone else. I’ll continue to be there for my friends, I’ll continue to be a listening ear if necessary but I will not longer shoulder their issues. I will no longer accept their problems as my own, looking for solutions and alternatives. No. I can’t. I’ve tasted the sweet taste of happiness, it’s taken me a while to get here but NOW, that I’m here I can’t let anyone threaten that peace.

To my friends, I love you. Sincerely. I want you to learn who you are, trust in yourself and know you deserve the very best from another human being. Trust that if s/he isn’t willing to offer their best, they aren’t willing to compromise to see you happy then Be prepared to move forward without them. Know that it’s healthy to be alone, and it’s necessary to carve time out to place yourself first.

Love yourself.

Tristan J {AKA} Tiffany, Your Friend.

Self-Sabo.

Life Lesson, Living Life

Low Key (High Key) I think I’m sabotaging my dating life by entertaining men who couldn’t possibly be good for me. Men who couldn’t give me half of what I am looking for, attracted to me, with the gift of gab, that’s who gets my attention. Ugh. Men who I know don’t deserve my attention, somehow captures it and when they eventually disappoint me, I’m hesitant to cut them off. Double Ugh. I’m sadden to know I’m bringing these horrid habits to a new city. Since I’m aware of the poor choices I am making, I am scaling back a bit from dating.

Don’t worry I’m still going to date but how about we try dating with purpose. Although I loathe writing a long list of what I am seeking in a guy, but maybe that’s exactly what I should be doing. I should have a clear understanding, but flexible, vision of what I’m looking for in an partner. God so help me, if I get carried away, and have a list of fifty thousand requirements. So to be sure I don’t get to carried away once I write down my ‘list’ I’ll post it. I know I know, scary right? And super super personal, but you guys are worth knowing all the intimate details of my life, since I already over share my shit.

Tristan Jonez

FYI – Wish me Luck! XOXO

We Wish You.

Life Lesson, Living Life

Hopefully your Christmas was merry, and Santa brought you everything you wrote on your list. Surprisingly this year, I asked for nothing but I received a super abundance of Love!

Every single year, my family throws a Christmas Eve dinner/party in Peekskill, NY. This year I was actually in jeopardy of missing it as my job was attempting to hold me hostage but by the heavens I broke free, took metro-north then a cab and arrived fashionably late. I must say, I had an amazingly fun time this year. Literally you could feel the love, bursting thru the damn walls. Lord knows my family has its ups and downs, hell my favorite uncle just passed away but his presence was felt. The house felt full.

Although I don’t always appreciate them, I’m lucky to have the family that I have. Even the folks whom I choose not to communicate with, they’ve helped to create who I am and I implore you to find things that you love about your own families.

Happy Holidays!

Tristan J

Why Wait?

Living Life, Wheres the Adventure?

Why wait for 2018? Do it Now.

Recently I listened to a video snippet, and the author told me, why wait until 2018 to make the changes you’d like to make?

And shorty, is right! Why am I going to wait until 2018 to start fresh, when everyday I wake up translates to a new beginning? With the rise of the sun, I am able to decide who I want to be and who I want in my World. Everyone’s manual for living looks different, so I have to find the instructions that work best for me. Find the people who work best, with my vibe, who brings out the best in me. Letting go is extremely hard for me, especially since my mother died. I hold on to folks tight, I look past their wrongdoings at my own detriment and I allow them to stay in my World. I find them sucking the life from me, and once I’ve hit rock bottom only then do I let them go.

This situation, this friendship, this love is NO longer serving me. Its no Longer allowing me to grow, no longer allowing me to be the best version of myself, no longer making me happy. I wish you the best, take care, thank you. I’ve found that speaking this outloud makes the transition easier. Can people change, sure they can, but for my own peace, they have to change elsewhere. Protecting my own energy is my top priority, everyone can and will be second my own self. Eff how they feel.

I’ve had a few light stealers, and I’ve let each and everyone of them go. God Bless ‘Em

Jonez.

Decipher Tales

Life Lesson, Living Life

I want people to mean what they say. I thought your word meant Your bond? When did that change? At what point did we just say what was convenient? Convenient for that moment in time? I get a migraine trying to decipher what I should believe and what I should question. Questioning everything a person/people say is fucking tiring. And folks, I’m tired.

If you tell me, I want to be with you, I’m believing that’s gospel. I’m not thinking that you want to be with me, and everyone else. Lately I’m finding folks want me to be everything to them while they give me the left over they have from being everything to everyone else. What makes you think I want a part time love affair? Nothing, absolutely nothing about me, gives that impression.

I’ve stopped trying to understand potential love interests, I just ride the wave until it’s over.

Tristan Jonez

Fly Awake 

Life Lesson, Living Life

The Best Seat Will forever be the window seat. I feel weightless every single time an aircraft takes off, appreciating where I’ve been and having gratitude for where I will travel to makes living life worth it. I can’t imagine who I’d be without the opportunity to visit certain countries/communities. Every time I experience a new place, a new part of myself is unlocked. 

If you don’t realize, I hold travel in high regard. You’ll never reach your highest level of enlightenment without travel. No excuses, Make it happen! 

Tristan Jonez! 

Reward Reward 

Living Life

With so few that truly defines what it means to be a friend, should we reward those who get it right? Now hear me out, I don’t think I should “pay” you to be my friend but if I’m out and about is it acceptable to purchase something for my friend? Personally my friendship in return is the reward for you completing your duties as “friend”. While I think gifts should be reserved for birthdays and holidays, you should always show your appreciation for a good friend. But don’t be confused with good friend behavior. ITS NOT THE SAME! 

Anyone can be a good friend, once. It’s the consistency that creates a balanced friendship. I shouldn’t wonder if your going to be there when it’s needed. Loyalty shouldn’t be questioned. And if I find myself questioning your loyalty then what use are you as a friend? 

Tristan J. 

Changes. 

Living Life

#TBT / #FBF 

I was going through a few of my old photos from as far as ten years ago and it definitely made me smile to see how much I’ve changed over the years. 

When I look at this girl, I see such a carefree, spirited person who had the World at her feet. I was still learning about myself and what I needed from myself. This Tristan, lived life as if the next day wasn’t promised. 

This Tristan J is a woman who knows when to be soft, and allow someone else to take the lead, but she’s independent enough to make whatever moves are necessary for survival, she’ll be victorious. She’s still a spirited opinionated woman who won’t hesitate to let you know when you’ve fuked up but she’ll help pick you back up. 
When you look at your old photos, what do you see? 

Jonez baby! 

Married? Eh. 

Life Lesson


For whatever reason, I’m not safe from married men. I would never ever date a married man, cuz karma would seriously hurt me. It’s not worth the problems you will have! As much as dating can be a pain, dating someone who is already committed to another just isn’t the move. I promise you! I’m honestly not sure what vibes I’m giving off to make married men even feel they are allowed to interrupt my space. 

SideNote: I’m semi questioning if I want to get married, since lately married folk can’t stay out my inbox. What’s the point of dedicating your love to someone if you’re going to look into have your sexual needs fulfilled elsewhere beside your partner? 

Jonez. 

Single Blues 

Living Life

As much as I’m enjoying “Single life” (Lies) I’m currently going thru Single Blues. It very much could have everything to do with the upcoming change in season which is right around the corner, either way, I’m not looking to be single anymore. However I’m not looking to jump into anything random, just for the sake of not being single. I wonder if it’s possible to forget how to be in a relationship? If it’s possible to forget how to be a party of two? What if I’m no good at being someone’s significant other? Can I admit I’m a bit nervous which I think is the reason for my Single Blues. I could just be living way too much in my head but I’m concerned. 

How have you all dealt with being single while feeling like it won’t be ‘just like riding a bike.’ 

Jonez