My Ex Says.

I’d recently met a guy online, and we were chatting, getting to know one another. Things were going fairly well, until he asked “What would you’re ex say about you?”

WHO THE HELL CARES!

I don’t give a shit, what my ex(es) would say about me honestly. And homeboy shouldn’t care either. Do I know what my ex would say about me? Of course I do, but his opinion doesn’t matter anymore. Even if the man was trying to make conversation, bringing up the last man, automatically disqualifies you! Questions about exes, isn’t exactly off limits but tread carefully. I don’t usually even ask why y’all broke up because I do not care!

All that matters is your single now!

Jonez.

Voices.

Whenever I go against my better judgement I ALWAYS end up losing. I swear I listen to the little voice inside that says “No, don’t go down that street, or No, don’t get in that car.” but when it comes to the opposite sex, I just don’t listen. Why do we do that? After a certain age, there are no more red flags, its just bluntness, like don’t effin date him girl! He will be a waste of damn time girl! Now you know you can do much better than him girl! But we forge on, cuz we tired of single. We tired of having no one to text or call. We just plain ole tired.

This is the last time that I go against the little voice. She sick of me and so am I. I understand that everyone cannot handle this awesomeness even when you make it so damn easy, the wrong man will still make a mess of things. The fun is embedded in the journey, so make it the best one ever!

Tristan J.

Aged.

There is only one you, and that is a disadvantage and an advantage in itself.

I am what I would like in return. Reread that, I am what I would like in return. Hands down, I would love to be my own friend. Someone is always telling us to take inventory of our lives, of the folks in our lives, that everyone doesn’t deserve a front seat, and etc, while I do agree with all of that, I think we need to first look at ourselves. Ask ourselves the hard questions, and answer them with honesty. We all have the ability to fool the outside world, but you can only lie to yourself for so long. Eventually you’ll lose your damn mind. This girl here doesn’t like loosing, so I’m honest with myself and others.

There is only one you, and that is an advantage and disadvantage in itself.

Trust in yourself. We continuously make bad decisions, but know that your ability to correct those mistakes make you you. Be who you are, and try not to let the sins of the World change you.

Curby

I was called Perfect. I was called Perfection.

Obviously I am far from perfect, but in someone’s eyes Im ‘It’, the epitome of what we all (most) aspire to be; perfect. I definitely took pleasure in his words. It feels good when a friend, lover, stranger, human being (whatever title) can acknowledge you or your talent! It’s an amazing thing, when someone can see way passed your flaws and still see you for who you are. Amazing things happen when you open yourself up to folks, as scary as that can be. What’s equally amazing is what can happen when you have someone in your corner rooting for you. That isn’t shy about letting you know they are cheering you on from the sidelines.

KK I appreciate our conversation last night, it definitely has my creative juices flowing this early morning. Continue to try, and everything will work in your favor. I promise.

Jonez

Stories.

There’s one story that I am tired of telling. I am tired of giving second chances, when, in all honesty, they didn’t deserve the first. I continue to put in the World what I would like in return. However I keep coming up short. Maybe I don’t really believe that I deserve the best, that I am worthy of having someone who supports me without saying, “Hey I’ve been supporting you.” Why not just show me? Don’t agree that I deserve more, just give more. The bare minimum doesn’t work here, especially if you agree that I deserve more.

It’s funny that men do not worry about how their actions/words will be perceived, they just do. But as a women I am careful with how I say things, as to not hurt the fragile ego of a man. Maybe it is time that I care less about your fuking egos? Don’t tell me that I am being sarcastic… put some hair on your chest and take it! Sarcasm shouldn’t be your focus when you have improvements that need to happen immediately! How can you tell a person, something is bothering you, expect them to resolve the issue when you can even check yourself? Pst!

I’ve run out of chances, and fuks to give.

Jonez.

 

Date X3

Are you obligated to tell the people you are dating about each other?

NOPE!

Unless you are in a relationship, you are not obligated to tell them about each other. This shouldn’t even be a question, honestly. If a man or woman wanted to be the only one then they would take the necessary steps to ensure that position. It makes me chuckle when I hear its in a ‘man’s nature’ to not be able to settle down, to HAVE to see multiple women, blah blah blah. Guess what? Eff that!

It’s funny because as I get older I want to settle down and get married BUT I am perfectly fine with dating (for now), why settle down with the first man who smiles at me? Nope, I will date as many folks as I’d like. If I am seeing two or three at the same time, well isn’t that what dating consists of? I used to be that girl, that would meet someone, like them, then focus only on them. Not anymore. Im going to give you whatever it is you are giving me. If you only have a few minutes a day for me, then thats what will be given to you. No more investing time in a person, if they are neglecting to do the same in return.

Tristan Jonez.

Soon, I promise

I wrote every single day in February. Sometimes I was able to kick out two and three topics for a single day. I was abundantly blessed with content that I was overflowing with words, and for that I’m grateful. Today is the seventh day of March and I have yet to write or post anything, to my readers I do apologize. I’ve just been living a little, taking some time off to do nothing, and everything. As much as it sucks that I haven’t been typing away at my computer keys, the break has been much needed. Inspiration was found, and will be given onto you all.

This might become a habit, but for now I am going to focus on doing what I do best… giving y’all my unsolicited opinion on all things relationship.

Tristan Jonez.

PS. A New post will be live on March 8. Thank you for sticking with me!

BodyonBody

I’ve always like the human body. I’ve admired the curves, the shape, the silhouette. I don’t think I’ve admired my body in all the ways that I needed to, but the body in all its many shapes, sizes and colors, I love.

Lately I’ve been thinking about creating and building a portfolio, and I would like to focus on the human body… The Naked Human body. In my mind, I know exactly how I want the photos to turn out, or at least the vibe of the photos. I want the naked body to be celebrated again, and because I have such an admiration, I believe I would be able to give life to the photos. Black and White is my absolute favorite so of course, that would be my go to, now I’m just missing the models.

This is my masterpiece of photo shoots, so I think I’m going to work my way up to it, and with time I’ll find the models who’ll trust me and my vision.

Would you like to model for me?

Jonez.

Opportunity to Waste

I’m a bit disappointed.

If a man says we are going to go at your own pace, he DOESN’T mean it. He’s only willing to go at ‘your’ pace if he feels as if its going at a pace he can accept. Most of the time, the pace will not match up, so there WILL be an issue. Don’t let him persuade you to do more than you’re willing to do, and don’t be in such a rush to go from single to taken.

So recently a guy that I dated last year reached out, explaining to me how he screwed up when we was dating initially and how he’d like the opportunity to start again. I ended things because I felt as if I was chasing him, that I was doing the most, and that our partnership wasn’t that of balance, amongst other things. So he came out the gate swinging, his communication skills had improved a billion times over, and he was making me feel secured.. but that was last week. This week, barely any communication, when asked he told me I wasn’t reaching out either. Like what?

Fellas, Stop starting habits if you know you aren’t going to keep them up! Don’t buy flowers every Saturday, cuz eventually I’ll get used to that. Don’t do anything if you aren’t willing to keep the shit up!

Be Consistent. Needless to say, that ‘relationship’ will not be revisited.

Jonez

Being/Doing

You have got to allow folks to do WHATEVER makes them happy. Seriously! If being with that man makes them happy, let it. If being alone makes them happy, let it. If being a complete asshole makes them happy, let it. Listen don’t stop anyone from being who they are and doing what they want to do. You might consider their choices a mistake, let it happen. Life has gotten better for me since coming to that realization.

Whatever you want to do I am all the way cool with it. Now, will I be friends with you, only if your happiness doesn’t interfere with my own. If what you are doing or being doesn’t calm my spirit then I can’t rock with you. Because I am going to respect whatever decisions you make, and I would expect the same courtesy from you. Too many times do we want folks to allow us room to do as we please, but we don’t extend the same courtesy to others, keep that in mind when being and doing.

Tristan Jonez.

Traffic

Be Careful who you choose to help. Some folks are only looking out for themselves, and they are willing to do or say anything to receive what they believe they should have. I have learned the hard way several times and yet it wasn’t until recently that I honestly learned my lesson.

I will put my needs above anyone else’s. I will placed myself first. If helping you does not benefit me, then my answer will be no. If attempting to make your life easier, will make mine harder by default, then the answer is no. I used to be scared of if I said No, will I make this person mad but now… who the hell cares! They will surely get over it, and move on to the next ‘victim’. I am not a punching bag for those who need something, nah. That’s done.

Remember, don’t go out of your way for people, who wouldn’t cross the street for you.

Jonez

I like your Excuse.

If I tell you what I want… If I make it a point to verbally tell you exactly what I want… and you still give an excuse, you don’t respect me.

I know what it means to be single, I know what it means to be in a relationship, dating, etc. In all situations my time needs to be respected. I find that being single this is my biggest issue. I am not going to spend time, time that I could be doing something I actually want to do, with you, if you don’t get it. If you are over the age of thirty you should ‘get it’. I am not looking to be married tomorrow BUT If this has no future, then call it quits and move on. Don’t try to rock with me because you know I am going to make sure I take care of home.

I was attempting to possibly date a guy, I made it known that if he wanted to be taken serious, and he wanted to take me out, he needed to make plans in advanced. Not the night before, but days prior. I even went as far to explain to him WHY this is a factor to me. And still there was opposition. Wanna know his reasoning? He’d rather be spontaneous, he didn’t want something to come up and he’d have to cancel on whatever was planned. I call BS. Mister, if something DID come up, just reached out and rescheduled. I am willing to compromise, but if your not even making an effort, why would I? I’m happier being single with myself, then trying to date a man who’ll eventually waste my time.

Jonez.