friends

Luv U.

Living Life

As much as we may want the very best for our friends. As much as we may want nothing but greatness for them, we cannot be willing to work harder for it than them. Trust, I know that shit sucks but you’ll kill yourself trying to obtain greatness on behalf of someone else. I’ll continue to be there for my friends, I’ll continue to be a listening ear if necessary but I will not longer shoulder their issues. I will no longer accept their problems as my own, looking for solutions and alternatives. No. I can’t. I’ve tasted the sweet taste of happiness, it’s taken me a while to get here but NOW, that I’m here I can’t let anyone threaten that peace.

To my friends, I love you. Sincerely. I want you to learn who you are, trust in yourself and know you deserve the very best from another human being. Trust that if s/he isn’t willing to offer their best, they aren’t willing to compromise to see you happy then Be prepared to move forward without them. Know that it’s healthy to be alone, and it’s necessary to carve time out to place yourself first.

Love yourself.

Tristan J {AKA} Tiffany, Your Friend.

AiseLife X Skoli

Living Life, Wheres the Adventure?

What a pleasure, to go from seeing Charles White (I’m Super Obsessed) at the Art Institute of Chicago, to seeing up & coming artists in the Chicago art and creative scene at AMFM Gallery. As all of you know, I’m a recent transplant in Chicago, so I had no real clue as to what to expect when I arrived at the venue. Some would say no expectations equals no disappointments, but I was pleasantly surrounded by an outward display of love. AiseLife’s art was captivating, I throughly enjoyed being transported back to the “rink”. Just looking at his depiction of a skating rink, the focus being on the skates, I created a whole narrative in my mind, I could even hear the music and feel the energy. Ultimately isn’t that what art is supposed to do? Create a story for you?

I also was treated to a live performance by @Nomezflute and @loony.is.normal It started off as beat bop meets flute meets soul meets jazz, which I know sounds hard to imagine but it works. Somehow the duo, they’re able to pair the different genres of music and release a vibe that transcends what you believe you’re into musically. As Nomezflute eloquently stated, [Paraphrasing] “this is enchanting music, so let the music move you. Do whatever the fuck You want. Dance to it, move an arm or a leg to it.”

We all vibed and rocked out to the sounds of DJ Skoli. I play the wall, especially when sober, hell even when intoxicated and guess what? I was dancing! So that can only be contributed to Red Line Shorty himself. Extremely focused while ‘spinning’ but amazingly humbled outside of the turn tables. The energy he puts into ensuring you feel him, is exactly why I had to return that same energy to him.

Tristan Jonez

Jonezy Note: I always feel as an intruder to this type of events where creatives show their creativeness. Although I am a creative in my own right, not being a performer, I am slow to open up in these spaces at times. However I am always excited to be in the vicinity of such spaces, the Love was present in abundance. Thank you AMFM Gallery, as well as Aiselife and DJ Skoli.

Taste of Chicago

Living Life

So much food, EVERYWHERE.

After years of wanting to go, wishing I could go, trying to set my schedule so I could go, I’ve finally made it to Taste of Chicago and they didn’t disappoint! I know, I had to have read all about the ins and out of “The Taste” as it’s affectionately known but I really didn’t have any expectations as to the food variety. I was surprised with Mexican, African, Jamaican, more Mexican and of course Two different varieties of Pizza. Although I opted to stay away from The dough, the smell was delicious enough to change my mind.

Day One was HOT! I met up with my fly sister, Shakila, copped some food tickets, and took a survey of our selection. Did I say it was hot? Cuz it was. My confession of never having Harold’s led us straight there and OMG. Juicy, tender, flavorful chicken. And yes!, I got the mild sauce!

After some prime shots, because hello! The sun was giving us this Glow, it was time for sweets. The stifling heat called for funnel cakes with ice cream, Italian and Mexican iceys.

Tristan Jonez

FYI Its called a Taste of Chicago because you can get a ‘taste’ of the food, ( a small but lightly filling portion) or a full portion. Genius!

When?

Living Life

When did we get into the habit of glossing over the ‘struggle’? I find that folks are so eager to show that they are winning, that it creates unrealistic expectations so when you do lose, personally, you lose your fucking mind. We know, with all forms of social media, you have to keep up airs, stay put on but isn’t that exhausting? Now don’t get me wrong, who the hell wants to solely focus on failures? Nobody. That’s a depressing place to be, but shit happens, right?

I want to create a place of equal balance. A place where we celebrate the lows just as fiercely as the highs. Now maybe I won’t be the actual person to create this haven I’m looking for but i do want to play my part. So although I do believe I vocalize my lows and highs equally, I will be more aware of the content I put out. Just as often as I scream men ain’t shit but fuck boys, I’ll turn around and showcase men who have the qualities that’ll make your knees buckle.
Balance.

T. Jonez

When In … Nashville

Living Life, Wheres the Adventure?

Let’s talk about Nashville.

I can definitely understand why Nashville is being hailed as the “New Vegas”. Last month I was able to experience most of what Honky Town (their words, not mine) had to offer. As y’all know every month, a destination is chosen, then my fly sister and I partake in the culture of said city. I must say, it was an interesting trip, at the least. Do you know how much trouble one can get into in Nashville? Tons babe! Side note: Be open-minded, and don’t be sober for too long.

After walking up and down the bar strip, we FINALLY found a bar that played Hip Hop/R&B, bonus its the rooftop. Double bonus is the famous Nudie’s Honky Tonk! Just know alcohol is definitely liquid courage, it helps you to live outside of your head. {DISCLAIMER: Know your fucking limit when drinking!} I had a great time, dancing, and vibing to the music. I believe always being in control and in charge of my life, sometimes leave me forgetting to enjoy the moment I’m currently in.

What city has helped to release your Inhibitions?

Tristan Jonez

What A Day

Life Lesson, Living Life

Yesterday was one of those days that go from bad to worse in a matter of minutes.

Meditating didn’t work, neither did positive thinking. It was just one asshole person after the other, after the other. It’s funny how people believe their problem is more important that anyone else, and you should stop what you’re doing to accommodate them. No matter how ‘nice’ you are when you aren’t moving in service of them, its an issue. Thank God, I have enough common sense to empower MYSELF, and teach myself whatever I need to know to improve my work life. Folks at my workplace would rather depend on others for their answers then have the nerve to get upset when your focus is needed elsewhere.

So I accept that it was just a shitty day, the good news, my day is officially over. The even better news, I will NEVER have to repeat this day for as long as I live. Just like that, I can move on and Cheers to tomorrow! I will manifest what I’d like for tomorrow, and it will be an amazing day. I will be notified of a new opportunity, something that elevates my spirit higher. Complaining just takes too much energy, and lord knows I need all my energy. Instead of complaining I will be changing my situation. Not happy with work? Change it. Maybe I won’t be quitting my job but I can join a different department, possibly a different shift. Make ALL the changes you need to until you are as happy as you’d like to be.

Tristan Jonez.

Bumble Bees.

Life Lesson, Living Life

I can remember when online dating was such a taboo, when you had to lie about where and how you met the person because online dating was such a no no. I’ve been online dating and meeting folks for what seems like forever, definitely before it was on trend. At this point, I feel as if I’ve tested out every option, damn there every app. Currently I was testing out the app Bumble, and this was after vowing to not attempt to date from online. I do appreciate the two other bumble options which are Bumble BFF and Bumble Biz, as I’ve ‘meet’ some interesting people. The catch with Bumble, it’s the female who initiates the interaction after both parties have swiped right on each other signifying they are interested. My only grip with that, is I’ve found that men are not interested enough in me to hold a conversation, after they’ve ‘connected’ with me. Personally, I do like when a man approaches me, cuz then I knew he is somewhat interested.

However I think I am going to delete Bumble, or possibly just keep it and use it as a tool to meet new BFF’s. Either way, dating isn’t for me anymore.

Tristan Jonez.

Caretaker.

Living Life

I don’t take care of myself as much as I need to or as much as I should. Because I’m there for others, I don’t have or make the time for myself. As a result, I’m miserable. I keep myself occupied with work so I’m too tired to evaluate my needs, too tired to care. Obviously this is a severely destructive path, and if I don’t start to take care of myself, I’ll be lying in a ditch somewhere. I think I was expecting someone to come along and save me from myself but this isn’t a fairy tale and no one will rescue me. I gotta save my damn self!

This week, I’m on vacation from work so I couldn’t hide from myself. My body was seriously malfunctioning, places were aching, my mind couldn’t settle itself and my body was desperately alerting me that it was about to crash. Although I definitely have responsibilities this week, I canceled everything to focus on me. To really put me first, to indulge in me, to allow my body the space to rest, to stretch and to do anything else she wanted to. I always feel like I deserve more than what I’m receiving in my dating life, but if I’m not treating my OWN self like I deserve more, why would anyone else?

Tristan Jonez.

Sick AF

Life Lesson


I’m always surprised by the number of folks who care about my well being, as the number of folks who don’t, especially when I am sick. Maybe it’s because I know what I would do in these type of life/death situation, Yes I know I’m dramatic! I’m aware that I am a rare breed, and I can’t expect everyone to do what I would do, but wtf. I’m not looking for anyone to go out of their way but It would be nice to have folks reach out, just to check on me.

So I will celebrate those who have, went above and beyond for me. I appreciate you!

Tristan Jonez.

Reward Reward 

Living Life

With so few that truly defines what it means to be a friend, should we reward those who get it right? Now hear me out, I don’t think I should “pay” you to be my friend but if I’m out and about is it acceptable to purchase something for my friend? Personally my friendship in return is the reward for you completing your duties as “friend”. While I think gifts should be reserved for birthdays and holidays, you should always show your appreciation for a good friend. But don’t be confused with good friend behavior. ITS NOT THE SAME! 

Anyone can be a good friend, once. It’s the consistency that creates a balanced friendship. I shouldn’t wonder if your going to be there when it’s needed. Loyalty shouldn’t be questioned. And if I find myself questioning your loyalty then what use are you as a friend? 

Tristan J.