So this year, January 23, I turned 34. I am officially the age my mother was when she had me, also, I was 17 when my mother died, so with this birthday I have lived half my life without my mother, so this was a special birthday, but also an awkwardly weird birthday too. As a way to alleviate the sadness factor, I asked all of my social media platforms, which is made up of folks that I actually (mostly) know in real life to send birthday cards. I received a whopping twenty two cards. I also received gifts! A book, an active journal, a Basquiat bookmark, a deck of self reflection/self help/self care cards and a set of AirPods. Can you believe it?
I damn sure can’t, and I just counted! Its crazy that, so many people love me enough to go out, look for a card, personalize it, add something special to the card, get stamps, take it to the post office or put it in a mailbox. I am that loved, that folks thought of me, to do that for me. Its so surreal that people would reach out to me in such a forgotten form, snail mail. As I get older, I am choosing to focus on the people who care about me, the people who show they care about me, instead of focusing on those who choose to not be present.
Once again, I thank you guys so very much for heeding my birthday call, and showing up so magically!
I’m always down for ANY shade of purple. It’s Matte? Even better! I had fun with NYX Ruthless, it goes on smoothly but beware if you have a heavy hand, as with a few swipes you’ll put too much in your lips. It’s very creamy, and surprisingly light, extremely pigmented as NYX Cosmetics products usually are.
This possibly can be used as a transition color from late summer into fall. But if you’re anything like me, it’ll be a colour you’ll wear all year round.
With so few that truly defines what it means to be a friend, should we reward those who get it right? Now hear me out, I don’t think I should “pay” you to be my friend but if I’m out and about is it acceptable to purchase something for my friend? Personally my friendship in return is the reward for you completing your duties as “friend”. While I think gifts should be reserved for birthdays and holidays, you should always show your appreciation for a good friend. But don’t be confused with good friend behavior. ITS NOT THE SAME!
Anyone can be a good friend, once. It’s the consistency that creates a balanced friendship. I shouldn’t wonder if your going to be there when it’s needed. Loyalty shouldn’t be questioned. And if I find myself questioning your loyalty then what use are you as a friend?
I thought we would be tight forever. Instead of having a maid of honor, he would be my best man. Never a secret, everything was laid on the line, cuz secrets couldn’t exist between my best friend and I. A sense of sereneity, because trusting someone with your whole entire heart is no easy feat but once its done, its the most bliss you can experience.
Then he falls in love, and you don’t.
And because you don’t fall in love, he begins to resent you. Soon enough, its only silence, on both ends. Whoever said love doesnt complicate life, lied. You even make an attempt to reciprocate those feelings, but even more resentment, cuz its not genuine. Eventually, there’s no hello. No more peace, just a girl wishing she had her best friend back.
I am not sure if I spoke about this here on Tristanjonez.com, but when you are being your true genuine self, the Universe reaches out and gives you the very things you are asking for. When we finally stop trying to put on, and imitate others, thats the very moment when your flower blossoms. I want to think I am always myself, but I know there are times when I hold back for fear of coming off a wrong way to someone. I am embracing my crazy, my contradictions, my warmness and my mood swings all at the same time.
As the quote states, we are out here acting like we live more than once. The time is now to fully embrace who you are, however you are. When you start being your true, amazing self, you are opening the doors so that your tribe is able to recognize you!
I’m maturing quite nicely. There are times that I want to lash out on the people that have wronged me, but lately I’ve been turning the other cheek. And for some I’ve even reached out to them. We are all human beings, and continue to make mistakes, I am no exception. I know that I don’t have any pride when it comes to reaching out to folks, there are folks out here that are extremely good people. I am willing to overlook some shadiness, and move forward. Do I need them? Not necessarily, I know I can go on living my life and be just fine. But I want to be more than just fine, there are folks that I want to be friends with, that the friendship that we’ve created has had meaning. So if I have to be the bigger person and say ‘hello’ first I am okay with that.
In life, some things are worth putting your pride to the side. Have you been the bigger person recently? Let’s Chat!