What a pleasure, to go from seeing Charles White (I’m Super Obsessed) at the Art Institute of Chicago, to seeing up & coming artists in the Chicago art and creative scene at AMFM Gallery. As all of you know, I’m a recent transplant in Chicago, so I had no real clue as to what to expect when I arrived at the venue. Some would say no expectations equals no disappointments, but I was pleasantly surrounded by an outward display of love. AiseLife’s art was captivating, I throughly enjoyed being transported back to the “rink”. Just looking at his depiction of a skating rink, the focus being on the skates, I created a whole narrative in my mind, I could even hear the music and feel the energy. Ultimately isn’t that what art is supposed to do? Create a story for you?
I also was treated to a live performance by @Nomezflute and @loony.is.normal It started off as beat bop meets flute meets soul meets jazz, which I know sounds hard to imagine but it works. Somehow the duo, they’re able to pair the different genres of music and release a vibe that transcends what you believe you’re into musically. As Nomezflute eloquently stated, [Paraphrasing] “this is enchanting music, so let the music move you. Do whatever the fuck You want. Dance to it, move an arm or a leg to it.”
We all vibed and rocked out to the sounds of DJ Skoli. I play the wall, especially when sober, hell even when intoxicated and guess what? I was dancing! So that can only be contributed to Red Line Shorty himself. Extremely focused while ‘spinning’ but amazingly humbled outside of the turn tables. The energy he puts into ensuring you feel him, is exactly why I had to return that same energy to him.
Jonezy Note: I always feel as an intruder to this type of events where creatives show their creativeness. Although I am a creative in my own right, not being a performer, I am slow to open up in these spaces at times. However I am always excited to be in the vicinity of such spaces, the Love was present in abundance. Thank you AMFM Gallery, as well as Aiselife and DJ Skoli.
Even now, I still sometimes give my power to a man. I’ll let him decide if he should dump me, if this “relationship” isn’t working for him, if he’s done. Well fuck that. I’m tired of being as polite as I can, speaking softly as to not step on the fragile male ego and for what? For them to believe they are who is in control?! Nah I’m done with that. A relationship is to be mutually beneficial and if it isn’t, well then Maybe I need to be the one to step.
I’m tired of men thinking their behavior is acceptable just because the last chick didn’t correct it. As I get older, I find myself less inclined to protect the male ego. What about my own? Laying down on the sword, becomes painful after the first time. If a man, especially one you are dating, can’t see how his behavior is affecting you, then that’s not a man you should engage with. This seemingly amazing human was single for a reason, the reasons JUST became clearly obvious to you.
Save Your Damn Selves.
Why wait for 2018? Do it Now.
Recently I listened to a video snippet, and the author told me, why wait until 2018 to make the changes you’d like to make?
And shorty, is right! Why am I going to wait until 2018 to start fresh, when everyday I wake up translates to a new beginning? With the rise of the sun, I am able to decide who I want to be and who I want in my World. Everyone’s manual for living looks different, so I have to find the instructions that work best for me. Find the people who work best, with my vibe, who brings out the best in me. Letting go is extremely hard for me, especially since my mother died. I hold on to folks tight, I look past their wrongdoings at my own detriment and I allow them to stay in my World. I find them sucking the life from me, and once I’ve hit rock bottom only then do I let them go.
This situation, this friendship, this love is NO longer serving me. Its no Longer allowing me to grow, no longer allowing me to be the best version of myself, no longer making me happy. I wish you the best, take care, thank you. I’ve found that speaking this outloud makes the transition easier. Can people change, sure they can, but for my own peace, they have to change elsewhere. Protecting my own energy is my top priority, everyone can and will be second my own self. Eff how they feel.
I’ve had a few light stealers, and I’ve let each and everyone of them go. God Bless ‘Em
I’m always down for ANY shade of purple. It’s Matte? Even better! I had fun with NYX Ruthless, it goes on smoothly but beware if you have a heavy hand, as with a few swipes you’ll put too much in your lips. It’s very creamy, and surprisingly light, extremely pigmented as NYX Cosmetics products usually are.
This possibly can be used as a transition color from late summer into fall. But if you’re anything like me, it’ll be a colour you’ll wear all year round.
Any Shade of purple is my go to. No, All shades of purple are my go to. There’s just something about purple that makes it a color that stands out on brown skin. Marvelous! I’m wearing NYX in Strawberry Parfait and Berry strudel, surprisingly they are both *Only* lip glosses! With NYX you can be assured that your lip colour will always be pigmented.
Less is always more with NYX Cosmetics.
With so few that truly defines what it means to be a friend, should we reward those who get it right? Now hear me out, I don’t think I should “pay” you to be my friend but if I’m out and about is it acceptable to purchase something for my friend? Personally my friendship in return is the reward for you completing your duties as “friend”. While I think gifts should be reserved for birthdays and holidays, you should always show your appreciation for a good friend. But don’t be confused with good friend behavior. ITS NOT THE SAME!
Anyone can be a good friend, once. It’s the consistency that creates a balanced friendship. I shouldn’t wonder if your going to be there when it’s needed. Loyalty shouldn’t be questioned. And if I find myself questioning your loyalty then what use are you as a friend?
#TBT / #FBF
I was going through a few of my old photos from as far as ten years ago and it definitely made me smile to see how much I’ve changed over the years.
When I look at this girl, I see such a carefree, spirited person who had the World at her feet. I was still learning about myself and what I needed from myself. This Tristan, lived life as if the next day wasn’t promised.
This Tristan J is a woman who knows when to be soft, and allow someone else to take the lead, but she’s independent enough to make whatever moves are necessary for survival, she’ll be victorious. She’s still a spirited opinionated woman who won’t hesitate to let you know when you’ve fuked up but she’ll help pick you back up.
When you look at your old photos, what do you see?
Every time I took the focus off myself and my goals, I took a Loss. When I started focusing on the people around me and how I could be a better friend, a better lover, a better whatever, I took a loss. I’m learning that I have to be all those things to myself first.
I don’t play soccer, but I would believe the concept is the same, if you’re a player and you take your eye off the ball, you lose. You open yourself up to someone coming in and stealing you shine, stealing your play, basically stealing your ball. Don’t take your eyes off the ball!
As far as I know this is my only version of this life, So I’m going to make sure I kill it!
Is it possible to ever really get over someone? What if that person is your soulmate?
I dont think there is a day that goes by that I do not think of Ali Sidney. He is still my dream man, my prince charming, my first love. I’m present in this moment as I am in every moment, and right now my thoughts are on him. I write about him from time to time, not as much as I should, but as much as needed. Lately I’ve been missing his friendship, he was my very best friend. I could tell him anything and he would be able to give me solutions in a way that no one has ever been able to duplicate. My soul aches for the man he could’ve become, the father, the friend, the future him.
Suicide is honestly a permanent solution to what is usually a temporary problem. It is a selfish decision, that affects all but the one committing suicide. You’re gone but we are left to deal with the pieces, some of which takes years to heal from. Wanting to quit is normal, but if you are harboring these feelings, take the time to reach out to someone. There are several avenues that are available to you, please know that you are NOT alone. I love you, and I am here to help in any and every way.
Sometimes I really act like I have no friends, and there is no one in my corner but thats the furthest thing from the truth. Although I do not see my people as frequently as I would like does not mean I have none. With that said, is the saying “Out of sight, out of mind” true? I do think that does hold some truth. When You don’t consistently see folks you tend to forget who you have, and who is there.
I am making changes as I see the things in the past hasn’t worked for me, so time to switch it up. I’ve been focusing on the people who leave my life, instead of celebrating the ones who choose to stay. My mother used to tell me if I had a good friend, that I was more than blessed, luckily for me I’m abundantly blessed.
How do you celebrate your friendships? Do you celebrate them?