Con

Consistency is a weird thing for me suddenly.

If you are new here, let me be the first to tell you. I am not usually consistent in my writing … or posting. I’ll have a burst of creative writing energy, and I’ll write for about a week, if I am lucky. Then poof! I disappear for any length of time. Then inspiration, or something that looks like it, will hit then I’m back again. However on this go ’round, I am making an effort to be consistent. Is it that simple? You make a choice and follow through? Has consistency always been that uncomplicated?

Well Has it?

Tristan Jonez.

Life Happens

Today wasn’t a hard day per se, but it was a tough day. A day were I wanted to quit everything, and say fuck everyone. Today was a day where I chose to look in the ‘mirror’ and tell myself to get it the fuck together. I’ve been slacking for the past three days. Nevermind I cooked Sunday dinner, that’s easy, I’ve been slacking on my Spanish lessons because I’ve been feeling so damn sorry for myself. Boo hoo Me. Needing love and attention from certain people but because of their own demons, they do not know how to express love in a way that I need it shown. Its hard living life without parents, especially if you know what its like to have an incredible one. I miss me some Garlick (my momma)! I used to wish for just a chance at a conversation, but I would never be able to let her go again. So I just deal with what my reality is now, and keep pressing forward.

Sidenote; Prior to going to the grocery store, I had made the decision to be done with my Spanish lessons. Tell me why in the checkout line, a Spanish man, decided to have a conversation with me in Spanish. And instinctively I responded to his questions with ease, as he was talking it was like I knew exactly what he was saying, and I knew how I wanted to respond. What a beautiful thing that interaction was. However flirting is flirting in any language so I had to go! What really made me rethink quitting, was seeing his face, as I was talking my Spanish. It was a look of surprise, like oh shit, she understands! She understands AND comprehend beyond ‘Hola”. Before I left he made sure to compliment me on my perfect Spanish! Maybe that was the motivation I needed to continue.

Tristan J

Dear Diary …

Recently I was asked to be a contributor for a publication which caters to a no bs approach to living a chill life. I haven’t said yes, I’m still debating what I have to offer this publication. Before I started writing this, I had to ask myself, if I didn’t jump at the chance to reach a bigger audience because I genuinely don’t have the time or if I’m questioning if I’m good enough. Most likely it’s the latter, self doubt it such a strange thing. I know I’m a good writer, and I know other people feel the same way about my writing but having to actually put it out there for strangers to read … am I good enough for that?

To calm myself, I usually remember reading Kimora Lee Simmons book, Fabulousity, where she writes, “Believe in those who believe in you.” So that usually how I calm those wicked thoughts in my head. It’s funny how you get older and question everything in life, but as a younger adult, I was beyond fearless. Slowly but surely I’m seeking to get back to ‘that’ place, but it starts with pushing myself beyond my comfort zone.

Here goes nothing …

Tristan J

Be You.

When I moved to Chicago the first time, I had an idea of who I wanted to be in my head, and I did what I could to bring her to life but looking back, I wasn’t being myself. I didn’t know what I wanted besides knowing I wanted to be more than who I was at the time. Although Chicago was my soulmate, I was running from a Love I thought would last forever, a man who no longer made me happy, and a city I was tired of hustling/struggling in. My initial move to chitown didn’t last long but everything happens for a reason. Four years later, I got the opportunity to live there again, and it’s been one of my happiest experiences.

Heading Into Texas, I know myself better. I’m not going there to find out who I am or to create another version of myself. I’m going with the notion that I am Tiffany, a food explorer, Natural body care using, art museum lover, who is ready to move past my comfort zone. I welcome all positive experiences, and will diligently turn my negatives into learning lessons. Ultimately I’ll be arriving into my new city as myself. My perfectly imperfect but fly self.

Tristan J.

Wine? More Please!

I wasn’t sure what to expect with Gabrielle Union’s book, and therefore I had no expectations. So she pleasantly surprised the shit out of me. I’m not sure why I pictured her as someone who was a bit rigid in her personality but the book was such a good read. Obviously there was some chapters that wasn’t easy to read, although I wasn’t the one living that particular truth, I could still feel her. I’ve added Gabrielle Union to the very short list of women who are friends in my head, Monica is number one, if you was wondering. I respect the level of honesty required to write her book. I’m thankful she found the courage to explore her past, to relive the not so nice parts, to be able to be a story teller to us.

As long as I can remember I was willing to support Gabrielle Union, the actress, now, I’m ready to support Gabrielle Union the woman.

Tristan Jonez.

Luv U.

As much as we may want the very best for our friends. As much as we may want nothing but greatness for them, we cannot be willing to work harder for it than them. Trust, I know that shit sucks but you’ll kill yourself trying to obtain greatness on behalf of someone else. I’ll continue to be there for my friends, I’ll continue to be a listening ear if necessary but I will not longer shoulder their issues. I will no longer accept their problems as my own, looking for solutions and alternatives. No. I can’t. I’ve tasted the sweet taste of happiness, it’s taken me a while to get here but NOW, that I’m here I can’t let anyone threaten that peace.

To my friends, I love you. Sincerely. I want you to learn who you are, trust in yourself and know you deserve the very best from another human being. Trust that if s/he isn’t willing to offer their best, they aren’t willing to compromise to see you happy then Be prepared to move forward without them. Know that it’s healthy to be alone, and it’s necessary to carve time out to place yourself first.

Love yourself.

Tristan J {AKA} Tiffany, Your Friend.

I’m Back… Kinda.

I’m a bit embarrassed that I haven’t updated my site since December 27! I so sincerely apologize! Honestly, Truly. I could blame it on being busy with life, but I will spare you excuses. I would hate to insult your intelligence, in that way, cuz y’all my people. You want the truth? I just haven’t felt like writing, I was a bit underwhelmed by the numbers. I write my heart out, then I only see a view or two. It was feeling like no matter, how amazing my photos were, or how relative my content may have been, I was getting absolutely no where. So I said off it, why write? Why post? Why be bothered with showing up, If no one else was.

Guess What?! I woke the hell up! Even if nobody ever shows up, I’m supposed to show up for myself. I am supposed to make sure I’m out here doing what makes me happy, and writing makes me happy, throw in some traveling, experiencing new food options and BAM! I’m the happiest I’ve ever been. So while I won’t promise a post everyday, I will post at least twice a week.

Thank You!

Tristan Jonez.

We Wish You.

Hopefully your Christmas was merry, and Santa brought you everything you wrote on your list. Surprisingly this year, I asked for nothing but I received a super abundance of Love!

Every single year, my family throws a Christmas Eve dinner/party in Peekskill, NY. This year I was actually in jeopardy of missing it as my job was attempting to hold me hostage but by the heavens I broke free, took metro-north then a cab and arrived fashionably late. I must say, I had an amazingly fun time this year. Literally you could feel the love, bursting thru the damn walls. Lord knows my family has its ups and downs, hell my favorite uncle just passed away but his presence was felt. The house felt full.

Although I don’t always appreciate them, I’m lucky to have the family that I have. Even the folks whom I choose not to communicate with, they’ve helped to create who I am and I implore you to find things that you love about your own families.

Happy Holidays!

Tristan J

Why Wait?

Why wait for 2018? Do it Now.

Recently I listened to a video snippet, and the author told me, why wait until 2018 to make the changes you’d like to make?

And shorty, is right! Why am I going to wait until 2018 to start fresh, when everyday I wake up translates to a new beginning? With the rise of the sun, I am able to decide who I want to be and who I want in my World. Everyone’s manual for living looks different, so I have to find the instructions that work best for me. Find the people who work best, with my vibe, who brings out the best in me. Letting go is extremely hard for me, especially since my mother died. I hold on to folks tight, I look past their wrongdoings at my own detriment and I allow them to stay in my World. I find them sucking the life from me, and once I’ve hit rock bottom only then do I let them go.

This situation, this friendship, this love is NO longer serving me. Its no Longer allowing me to grow, no longer allowing me to be the best version of myself, no longer making me happy. I wish you the best, take care, thank you. I’ve found that speaking this outloud makes the transition easier. Can people change, sure they can, but for my own peace, they have to change elsewhere. Protecting my own energy is my top priority, everyone can and will be second my own self. Eff how they feel.

I’ve had a few light stealers, and I’ve let each and everyone of them go. God Bless ‘Em

Jonez.

Fly Awake

The Best Seat Will forever be the window seat. I feel weightless every single time an aircraft takes off, appreciating where I’ve been and having gratitude for where I will travel to makes living life worth it. I can’t imagine who I’d be without the opportunity to visit certain countries/communities. Every time I experience a new place, a new part of myself is unlocked.

If you don’t realize, I hold travel in high regard. You’ll never reach your highest level of enlightenment without travel. No excuses, Make it happen!

Tristan Jonez!

Beauty Related.

Any Shade of purple is my go to. No, All shades of purple are my go to. There’s just something about purple that makes it a color that stands out on brown skin. Marvelous! I’m wearing NYX in Strawberry Parfait and Berry strudel, surprisingly they are both *Only* lip glosses! With NYX you can be assured that your lip colour will always be pigmented.

Less is always more with NYX Cosmetics.

Tristan J

Reward Reward

With so few that truly defines what it means to be a friend, should we reward those who get it right? Now hear me out, I don’t think I should “pay” you to be my friend but if I’m out and about is it acceptable to purchase something for my friend? Personally my friendship in return is the reward for you completing your duties as “friend”. While I think gifts should be reserved for birthdays and holidays, you should always show your appreciation for a good friend. But don’t be confused with good friend behavior. ITS NOT THE SAME!

Anyone can be a good friend, once. It’s the consistency that creates a balanced friendship. I shouldn’t wonder if your going to be there when it’s needed. Loyalty shouldn’t be questioned. And if I find myself questioning your loyalty then what use are you as a friend?

Tristan J.