#TBT / #FBF
I was going through a few of my old photos from as far as ten years ago and it definitely made me smile to see how much I’ve changed over the years.
When I look at this girl, I see such a carefree, spirited person who had the World at her feet. I was still learning about myself and what I needed from myself. This Tristan, lived life as if the next day wasn’t promised.
This Tristan J is a woman who knows when to be soft, and allow someone else to take the lead, but she’s independent enough to make whatever moves are necessary for survival, she’ll be victorious. She’s still a spirited opinionated woman who won’t hesitate to let you know when you’ve fuked up but she’ll help pick you back up.
When you look at your old photos, what do you see?
Every time I took the focus off myself and my goals, I took a Loss. When I started focusing on the people around me and how I could be a better friend, a better lover, a better whatever, I took a loss. I’m learning that I have to be all those things to myself first.
I don’t play soccer, but I would believe the concept is the same, if you’re a player and you take your eye off the ball, you lose. You open yourself up to someone coming in and stealing you shine, stealing your play, basically stealing your ball. Don’t take your eyes off the ball!
As far as I know this is my only version of this life, So I’m going to make sure I kill it!
Is it possible to ever really get over someone? What if that person is your soulmate?
I dont think there is a day that goes by that I do not think of Ali Sidney. He is still my dream man, my prince charming, my first love. I’m present in this moment as I am in every moment, and right now my thoughts are on him. I write about him from time to time, not as much as I should, but as much as needed. Lately I’ve been missing his friendship, he was my very best friend. I could tell him anything and he would be able to give me solutions in a way that no one has ever been able to duplicate. My soul aches for the man he could’ve become, the father, the friend, the future him.
Suicide is honestly a permanent solution to what is usually a temporary problem. It is a selfish decision, that affects all but the one committing suicide. You’re gone but we are left to deal with the pieces, some of which takes years to heal from. Wanting to quit is normal, but if you are harboring these feelings, take the time to reach out to someone. There are several avenues that are available to you, please know that you are NOT alone. I love you, and I am here to help in any and every way.
Sometimes I really act like I have no friends, and there is no one in my corner but thats the furthest thing from the truth. Although I do not see my people as frequently as I would like does not mean I have none. With that said, is the saying “Out of sight, out of mind” true? I do think that does hold some truth. When You don’t consistently see folks you tend to forget who you have, and who is there.
I am making changes as I see the things in the past hasn’t worked for me, so time to switch it up. I’ve been focusing on the people who leave my life, instead of celebrating the ones who choose to stay. My mother used to tell me if I had a good friend, that I was more than blessed, luckily for me I’m abundantly blessed.
How do you celebrate your friendships? Do you celebrate them?
I learned a lesson today folks. Well I received a nice little reminder… STOP begging people to support you. As much as we all want support stop begging people to give it to you. If its not coming from a place where they would like to do it freely, then I don’t want it. As a ‘friend’ I shouldn’t have to beg you for your support, cuz if the shoe was on the other foot, I would gladly be repping your name in these streets.
I was also reminded, that people might not be supporting you because your wack! You have to be honest with yourself about your content. It is on message with your brand? Is it good? If you was scrolling by is this something that would catch your eye? I want you to enjoy the success that is SURELY going to come if you continue to have a critical eye about your content. I use Instagram heavily, so I am constantly evaluating my content. If I never heard about ‘Tristan Jonez’ is this a post that would pull me in, would I want to find out about this person, would I even care about this content?
You have to be your OWN support system. Until your content, your personality , your vibes, brings on your tribe. Treat that one supporter like gold man. When I find really good content, I can’t shut up about it. Word of Mouth is your best marketing tool, but to get there you have to put in the work.