STOP LETTING FOLKS ATTACH THEMSELVES TO YOU!
I didn’t really understand, or believe that folks can most times see the greatness in you, before you see it. And some of those same people, will attach themselves to you, not because they would like to help cultivate your greatness, they want to get as much as they can out of you, without having to put that much into you! It takes you being aware of who you are, and even more aware of the company that you are keeping.
I’ll be the first to tell you, when I travel I use my gut for singling out where I should walk, or if its really safe to go in this or that direction. However when it comes to people I am not always able to use good judgement. I want to see the best/good in everyone, even when they do me wrong. I’m working on changing some of my ways, although it pains me, sometimes you have to love folks from a very far distance.
Energy is real! Vibes are real! You have to be vigilant in who you are surrounding yourself with, continue to take inventory of how YOU feel around different people, are you more angry, anxious, sad? Hows the quality of y’all conversation, are they invested in you as you are in them? Are they contributing to the friendship in ways that are beneficial to you? Solely them? Take control of your life and the folks YOU allow in!
For a long time I’ve wondered why I only attract the broken, and today I realized there must be something broken inside of me that I have yet to discover or uncover. Maybe it’s possible I am not over the things that have happened to me in life, or I haven’t moved on as much as I believed I had. Every time I meet a new person, or an old person comes back into my life, it seems we are just repeating the routines of yester-whenever. If I’m being honest, I’m tired of the same ole, same ole.
My next move is learning to create those very necessary boundaries, and keeping in place what contingencies I have if those clear boundaries are crossed. Being sweet is a wonderful quality to have but I have to stop letting folks believe that I am to be treated however they see fit at the moment. ESPECIALLY If I’ve already made it known, that those behaviors are not acceptable. I’m tired of being frustrated, tried of feeling used, and I’m damn sure tired of feeling as if I owe anyone something! Loyalty will get you killed! So for once, I’m gong to be loyal to myself, and start giving myself whatever it is thats needed.
I know I talk about dating all the time, well at least I think about it often enough, but this time I think I am done with dating. It’s exhausting. Seriously, I do not think I have the energy it takes to really meet anyone. Talk to anyone, actually get to know any damn one. Ugh. No Thank you.
Sure I tell you guys that you should keep hope alive, and push pass how you may be feeling at the currently moment, because there is always hope to be found. But blah! All I can tell you guys, Is good damn luck!
First I will delete all the dating apps I have, they are useless. However I did have success, and haven’t met many amazing men. To keep the balance, in the interim of deleting all apps I will be opened to meeting folk IF they approached me. I wouldn’t be so quick to turn them away. Although I am not willing to change my number, I will be blocking every Ex that still reaches out. No need to continue to give people access to me, when that relationship has ended. I’m sure I will make other changes as the weeks carry on, but this will do for now.
So I’m not sure if this is a pattern but its staring to feel like one.
Men who chase women down, with only the intention of wasting her time. If we are friends, and you want more, I am all for making your intentions known, but if you are ready to go there, be ready for the consequences as well. Why are you ‘awakening’ her if you have no intention beyond that action? Just leave us be!
On two separate occasions with two different men, I’ve been pursued, only to agree to a date, that they waste my damn time. I’ve long stopped listening to words that men, say and look towards their actions. If nothing is being shown, why would I stay?
I want people to mean what they say. I thought your word meant Your bond? When did that change? At what point did we just say what was convenient? Convenient for that moment in time? I get a migraine trying to decipher what I should believe and what I should question. Questioning everything a person/people say is fucking tiring. And folks, I’m tired.
If you tell me, I want to be with you, I’m believing that’s gospel. I’m not thinking that you want to be with me, and everyone else. Lately I’m finding folks want me to be everything to them while they give me the left over they have from being everything to everyone else. What makes you think I want a part time love affair? Nothing, absolutely nothing about me, gives that impression.
I’ve stopped trying to understand potential love interests, I just ride the wave until it’s over.
I claim ownership over no one. Everyone is their own person, to live and love as they see fit. Personally I love fully in my own spirit, to do as I please, for as long as it pleases me. I do not, and cannot make anyone ‘stay’ because when Its time for me to leave, I do. I’ve always tried to be the best version of myself, see the good in folks, and live life as if it was the most precious gift I could’ve ever been given. There have been times where my significant other couldn’t not relate to me, but you would have to step outside of yourself to understand, and honestly most people wont.
I want you all to be true to the essence of you. No matter what that may look like to others. Only claim ownership over your own soul, then you’ll be able to move in ways which you haven’t before.
I do believe we some (most) times forget that we are the prize. We are the ones to be pursued, cherished, adored! You, above all else, have to know your value. How can you show someone how you should be treated if you aren’t treating yourself as such. Folks learn from action!
I once found myself not being myself because in my mind, this is a “good guy” and I have to fit into whatever image he sees of me. I don’t want to loose this man’s interest cuz then I’m back to square one, and who wants to start all over? But I can’t settle, too many close calls to settling, that I’m not going to start that now. I’m the prize, and I have to treat myself as such. It’s no need to advertise what I bring to the “table”, as the man that’s looking for me will be able to realize my potential!