Married? Eh.

For whatever reason, I’m not safe from married men. I would never ever date a married man, cuz karma would seriously hurt me. It’s not worth the problems you will have! As much as dating can be a pain, dating someone who is already committed to another just isn’t the move. I promise you! I’m honestly not sure what vibes I’m giving off to make married men even feel they are allowed to interrupt my space.

SideNote: I’m semi questioning if I want to get married, since lately married folk can’t stay out my inbox. What’s the point of dedicating your love to someone if you’re going to look into have your sexual needs fulfilled elsewhere beside your partner?

Jonez.

No Request Granted

I can be super honest and open with you all right? Without judgement? Even tho, I don’t give a shit about anyone judging me, but y’all wouldn’t.

By a show of hands, how many of us had a “friendwithbenefits”? Well I did. However I wouldn’t necessarily say we were friends. I wasn’t making plans for us to hang out outside of a bedroom, and he wasn’t calling so we could chop it up about our life goals. Our relationship was very specific, we talked enough to assess what was needed sexually. The few times we ventured into actual conversation about actual topics, things felt weird, at least for me.

So imagine my utter shock and surprise when he requested me on Facebook! Like ummmm Sir, what is you doing baby? It’s weird thinking of him going through my photos, and seeing my friends, reading my thoughts, I haven’t accepted the request and I’m not sure if I will.

Would you?

Tristan J

Showtime.

Life is funny like that.

Sometimes I really wonder if my life is a reality show to the angels. And if they’re constantly yelling plot twist! The number of weird randomness happening is at an all time high, and I’m just trying to get thru my work week without falling on my face. If tonight was the season finale for my reality show, I’m scared but slightly excited for next season’s foolery.

Jonezy

Option Two?

My latest topic was to include asking the age old question, “Do you have a “What If Guy” but I’ll be saving that for another day. I just realized, it’s possible that I’m the “Back Up Girl”

In my head I heard the SVU sound, dah dah. I definitely don’t want to be anyone’s fall back chick, Ew. Out of the men I’ve seriously dated, there are only two that I am no longer cordial with, however I’ve remained friendly with the rest. Is it so far fetched that they stay in contact with me, just in case their relationships don’t work out in a way that they’ve planned them to? Or is my thinking totally off?

Someone I was dating as a young adult recently attempted to reconnect with me, but it was so out of the blue. And to make matters stranger, he didn’t ease into it, it was more like “I miss you, Let’s be together… I’m serious this time.” So were you not serious before? Without even asking me if I’m involved, he just made an assumption that I’m single and looking to be in a relationship with him. Eh. Since I haven’t responded happily to his new revelation I haven’t heard from him, besides him “liking” my photos on Instagram.

Now do you see why I’ve given up the idea of dating? Migraine City.

Tristan J.

Single Blues

As much as I’m enjoying “Single life” (Lies) I’m currently going thru Single Blues. It very much could have everything to do with the upcoming change in season which is right around the corner, either way, I’m not looking to be single anymore. However I’m not looking to jump into anything random, just for the sake of not being single. I wonder if it’s possible to forget how to be in a relationship? If it’s possible to forget how to be a party of two? What if I’m no good at being someone’s significant other? Can I admit I’m a bit nervous which I think is the reason for my Single Blues. I could just be living way too much in my head but I’m concerned.

How have you all dealt with being single while feeling like it won’t be ‘just like riding a bike.’

Jonez

In my feels

Sometimes you have to sit back and look at all the amazing things that are happening in your life and appreciate them. I’m so freaking blessed, that it’s pointless to even list everything that’s going on. Do I have areas of opportunity (improvements) yes plenty, but I’m going to focus on all that’s currently making me happy.

After forever of trying, my booty is bigger! 🙌🏾 Ladies, Walk! It’s the root of all good things. I’ve been drinking water like it’s going out of style, so my skin is looking like a beautiful chocolate bar! I’m edible. I’ve been making it a priority to hang out, to see new things in my own city, and I’ve been loving it. Queens still sucks but I’m managing well. My small circle of friends have been showing out lately! Making me feel like the luckiest girl, shout out to NoIGMoshè!

Sure there’s a million things going severely wrong but I ain’t worried bout that! Nah I’m going to focus on the blessings that are pouring down on me. You should do the same, if you aren’t! Lovessssss you!

Jonezy

Vent Tent.

I am a final destination for the person who is supposed to be with me. I am not a pit stop for those trying to find their way through life’s journey! I know I am amazing! I am dedicated to doing almost whatever is necessary to ensure a man reaches his potential. However I am not here to be a step stool, nah. It’s possible I’m just in feels right now, cuz I am so tired of men having their hand out for what they believe I should be doing for them. When did it become my job to court a man? Is it also my job to my open the door for my date, pick up my date from his house? What else am I now required to do for a man?

I ask for consistency. I’m sure there are many other things I ask for from a man but everything I ask for I can give and am willing to give. I KNOW I can play the game just like, if not better than a man. But who the hell has time for that? Certainly not I. So … for the time being I will be focusing on what I need to do to better myself. When the time is right, my King will make himself known. Until then, I’m just out here living Life.

Thank you for letting me vent!

Jonezy

Dude Stop.

I want to believe I am honest in what I write, especially when it comes to information about myself. Plus folks are going to judge, so I’d rather folks judge me based on my actual truth. Since I turned 31, I’ve felt as if I have to get married, I have to have children, sooner than later, so I was making decision based of that fact. WRONG MOVE!

Recently I realized Im out here looking nuts. I’m allowing shit from men that I wouldn’t even date otherwise, dealing with BS just cuz I panicked that I would be alone. I was like well Jonez, having someone who is half decent is better than not having anyone at all. See, I was straight tripping! I had to really be honest with myself about my actions, I had to make the choice, to make myself happy long term. I left two relationships in my life because of the long term. I wasn’t wit being disrespected at 25, so I had to chat with myself cuz allowing disrespect now, wasn’t the move.

Plus Im not alone, I have you guys. Loves You.

Tristan Jonez

The Outside World

In a minute, I’m going to post this question to Instagram, but I wanted to enter my own views on ‘wax’ before my opinion was swayed by others.

You’ve just experienced an emergency, the guy you’re dating can assist, but doesn’t/failed to do so. Would you continue to date them?

In my humble opinion, I’m not going to continue to date you. Strictly on principle, because if the situation was reversed I would do what I could to help. Especially if this is someone I want to be with. Now obviously, providing assistance comes within reason, for example if they are a relator and you’re looking for an apartment, I would assume they would assist. Or if I’m in the market for a car, and he had a relationship with a car dealership, I would assume he would at least make the introduction. I know the art of chivalry is dead, but I want my guy to be soaking in gentlemanly qualities. I don’t want to date a man, who doesn’t at least try to remedy a problem I may be having. My relationship should be the peace, from the outside World.

Jonez.

Revamper

I know it takes money to make money but once you invest money in something you are making the decision to be all the way official with it. My website desperately needs to be turned into an official website. I am super proud of myself, for my content but the general look of Tristanjonez.com needs to be revamped. When I do come to the site, to read what I’ve written, I get a lil bummed out by the look of it.

I wonder if my readers feel the same as I do when I visit my site, if so I need to put the money into my site. February was my happiest month on record, and I want to believe that maintain Tristanjonez.com had much to do with that. So its only right that I treat her as good as she’s treated me.

I am making it my business to get my act together, personally and professionally. Let’s focus on professionally though.

Jonez.

Blk Men Only?

Are you only interested in dating black men?

I’ve thought about this question, and my response. Hell I am still thinking about it. I want to believe that I am an open minded female, that I would be willing to date whomever but will I? As a kid, my mother would always joke, that I would be the one in the family who would bring an Indian or Asian man to Christmas dinner before a black man. I am a lover of people, so race doesn’t matter much. I’m opened to dating black men, but if there’s attraction there, why not?

I do find, that even though I am opened to dating other races, men of other races do not feel the same. Being intimate is one thing but being open to a long term relationship, is another monster to conquer. Hell black men don’t seem interested in dating a black woman so…

To answer the original question, No I am not only interested in dating a black man, just looking for one who’ll respect and Love me, no matter the race.

Tristan

Q&A, pt2

So I posted Q&A yesterday to the site as well as to Instagram, and to my surprise the response was if a person deems you important, or the relationship important, they will make the time to communicate with you. But on the flip side, you have to be willing to be prepared to make sacrifices, since they may not always be able to make the time, especially if their job is that demanding.

Its all in the effort! I am willing to make the sacrifice of not being able to speak to you as frequently as I would like If I believe you are making the effort to find the time to speak to me. I believe its vice versa as well. My love would be willing to create the time, if he has to, so that he can communicate with me. And I don’t always expect a phone call, if you can send a text message with just a heart, OMG, I would be exceedingly satisfied. We always say its the small things, and it truly is.

Jonez.