Even now, I still sometimes give my power to a man. I’ll let him decide if he should dump me, if this “relationship” isn’t working for him, if he’s done. Well fuck that. I’m tired of being as polite as I can, speaking softly as to not step on the fragile male ego and for what? For them to believe they are who is in control?! Nah I’m done with that. A relationship is to be mutually beneficial and if it isn’t, well then Maybe I need to be the one to step.
I’m tired of men thinking their behavior is acceptable just because the last chick didn’t correct it. As I get older, I find myself less inclined to protect the male ego. What about my own? Laying down on the sword, becomes painful after the first time. If a man, especially one you are dating, can’t see how his behavior is affecting you, then that’s not a man you should engage with. This seemingly amazing human was single for a reason, the reasons JUST became clearly obvious to you.
Save Your Damn Selves.
So I’m not sure if this is a pattern but its staring to feel like one.
Men who chase women down, with only the intention of wasting her time. If we are friends, and you want more, I am all for making your intentions known, but if you are ready to go there, be ready for the consequences as well. Why are you ‘awakening’ her if you have no intention beyond that action? Just leave us be!
On two separate occasions with two different men, I’ve been pursued, only to agree to a date, that they waste my damn time. I’ve long stopped listening to words that men, say and look towards their actions. If nothing is being shown, why would I stay?
I can remember when online dating was such a taboo, when you had to lie about where and how you met the person because online dating was such a no no. I’ve been online dating and meeting folks for what seems like forever, definitely before it was on trend. At this point, I feel as if I’ve tested out every option, damn there every app. Currently I was testing out the app Bumble, and this was after vowing to not attempt to date from online. I do appreciate the two other bumble options which are Bumble BFF and Bumble Biz, as I’ve ‘meet’ some interesting people. The catch with Bumble, it’s the female who initiates the interaction after both parties have swiped right on each other signifying they are interested. My only grip with that, is I’ve found that men are not interested enough in me to hold a conversation, after they’ve ‘connected’ with me. Personally, I do like when a man approaches me, cuz then I knew he is somewhat interested.
However I think I am going to delete Bumble, or possibly just keep it and use it as a tool to meet new BFF’s. Either way, dating isn’t for me anymore.
Stop allowing men to treat you as if you are regular. You are not! You are of the absolute best of the best. Lately, Even I have forgotten of my magic, the essence of me, that makes me who I am. I am not here just to accept so willingly the bullshit that a man chooses to provide me. And if he cannot see what he has available to him, let him not see anything. Too many times do we forget there are millions upon millions of men out there, so we have such a selection. WE are the ones who decide who we will date, who we will let pursue us, who we will … I think you get my point!
For the time being, I am going to focus on my challenge of being a tourist in New York City for the month of December.
I want people to mean what they say. I thought your word meant Your bond? When did that change? At what point did we just say what was convenient? Convenient for that moment in time? I get a migraine trying to decipher what I should believe and what I should question. Questioning everything a person/people say is fucking tiring. And folks, I’m tired.
If you tell me, I want to be with you, I’m believing that’s gospel. I’m not thinking that you want to be with me, and everyone else. Lately I’m finding folks want me to be everything to them while they give me the left over they have from being everything to everyone else. What makes you think I want a part time love affair? Nothing, absolutely nothing about me, gives that impression.
I’ve stopped trying to understand potential love interests, I just ride the wave until it’s over.
Do you have a certain meal, or food, you ALWAYS order when you go out?
Well I do, and its always seafood, specifically salmon. I want to believe I am adventurous when it comes to meals and what I am willing to try. However I can admit, Salmon is just that ‘thing’ my eye always look for when out. One of my favorite restaurants in New York is Clyde Frazier’s Wine & Dine. Not only is it a semi upscale sport bar, but there is a half basketball court, where you can perfect your jump shot. The food is absolutely divine! My go to meal is the blackened Scottish salmon with bourbon butter spinach and garlic mashed potatoes, with a glass of white wine. The salmon is so delish, that it melts in your mouth! I usually can’t squeeze in dessert but when YOU go please make room for the ricotta donuts!
For me, this is the perfect date night spot, whether its a first date or you’re a couple that’s looking to try a new place. If you are single, fret not for the bar area, is incredible! AND Clyde Frazier’s has a nice line up for happy hour. Hopefully I will catch you there one of these days, don’t ever be too shy to say hey!
SideNote: I’m horrible at taking photos at restaurants, so use your imagination! I promise I’ll do better.
I do believe we some (most) times forget that we are the prize. We are the ones to be pursued, cherished, adored! You, above all else, have to know your value. How can you show someone how you should be treated if you aren’t treating yourself as such. Folks learn from action!
I once found myself not being myself because in my mind, this is a “good guy” and I have to fit into whatever image he sees of me. I don’t want to loose this man’s interest cuz then I’m back to square one, and who wants to start all over? But I can’t settle, too many close calls to settling, that I’m not going to start that now. I’m the prize, and I have to treat myself as such. It’s no need to advertise what I bring to the “table”, as the man that’s looking for me will be able to realize my potential!